Embrace the shift - E10

Clancy Denton  0:00  
Welcome to the loud quiet. Ooh, empty nester. Okay. What does that mean?

Rick Denton  0:06  
I think that actually probably is the theme of the nest. What are we doing? Let's do this. Let's do this thing.

Are we recording? Okay

Clancy Denton  0:15  
Great

Sans, children just does we need a tissue box up here. Follow along on our journey and maybe you know we can learn from others

Rick Denton  0:23  
I have no clue how to be empty nester there.

Clancy Denton  0:25  
This is the loud, quiet, living the empty nest. 

Welcome back to the loud quiet. This is episode 10. We made it to 

Rick Denton  0:36  
oh my gosh, yeah, 

Clancy Denton  0:37  
this is 10 So we've been at this now for 10 weeks. 

Rick Denton  0:43  
We're out of fingers. 

Clancy Denton  0:44  
Yeah, it's, I don't know. I'm I mean, I'm glad we're still doing it. I hope you guys are still enjoying listening and watching. And again, we'd love to have your input on any topics. If you'd like to be a guest, we would love to, you know, y'all don't want to see us all the time. So we love when we have our guests on and I think today's topic once we get into the actual topic will be something that all empty nesters no matter what age you are, can relate to hopefully I would imagine, you know are still probably even us with our age of parents. They I think everyone is going to be able to relate to what we're going to be discussing but we first wanted to start off with you know, we didn't get to finish our recap. Parents Weekend with Tegan and we'll get to why. When we get to our if you upcoming topic,

Rick Denton  1:53  
if you watch the end of the video, we even are saying that of oh, so yeah, we'll we'll do a recap. Or maybe we'll do an episode. We don't know we had something in mind. And yeah, the topic that we're gonna be talking about today, these this wasn't planned, no. And it's something that's was on our hearts has been in our hearts, and now is going to be a chance for us to talk through and share. And I hope that folks can, I'd love to hear their comments and how they handle it. As we said from the beginning, we're trying to learn as a part of this process. We don't have all the answers.

Clancy Denton  2:23  
But let's do it. Let's talk about so here. You know, we had so much fun with Tegan with Parents Weekend. Part two, this was at the football game. And we had we just had a great time just getting to see her. You know, I think we said we kind of referenced how it seems like she's just so much more grown up. She was always mature, but just on a different level. And we got to take her friends out to dinner they were all amazing, sweet, respectful, exactly the kind of kids that

Rick Denton  2:55  
they thankedall of us. 

Clancy Denton  2:56  
Yes, you want 

Rick Denton  2:57  
I appreciated that

Clancy Denton  3:00  
your kids to have around, they've been a great support system for her. Which will come into 

Rick Denton  3:09  
So many teases. 

Clancy Denton  3:11  
That we did, we'd had a great time, but

Rick Denton  3:15  
Now Clancy so something that I did notice it's surrounds food again, right? Not here in this picture. But taking the people out to dinner, the breakfasts that we have the lunches that we have Parents Weekend and foods seem to go hand in hand.

Clancy Denton  3:29  
Well, you're in a different place. So of course you're you know, 

Rick Denton  3:32  
so much fun to discover new places, and and to discover them and be able to be in a situation because one of them we found when we were there dropping her off. And to have her say, Oh, I really want to go back to that place again. Yeah, this is her home.

Clancy Denton  3:46  
I'm already thinking about the and I think we already talked about the Mexican food place. So I really am ready to go back and maybe in a couple of weeks when we go back we'll get to visit or try another one. But it was interesting though, just being on campus. And kind of what our topic today is. How do we now adult these adult children and it was very interesting seeing dynamics of kids and their parents on campus. And again, we didn't get that with Tanner freshman year because they didn't have parents weekend. This time we were fully submerged in the dorm on the campus riding the train. suddenlink there was a big fight on the Sunlake between a mom and her daughter. I mean it was the amount of mom cheese that I heard from other luckily not from our child. But we didn't go I'm sure she was saying things when she got back to her dorm but it was interesting seeing no I've been on my own for six weeks. Don't come back in here and try to be my authority.

Rick Denton  5:04  
Don't try to be my authority. There also, I think an element of what we saw on the train, which was I mean, this was F bomb riddled, this was, this was housewives esque type. You know, one of the individuals in the fight just abandoned the train left the other individual to continue on. I think some of that too, was not only don't be my adult, don't be my authoritative figure. Don't act like my friends. You're still my mom. You're still my dad. Don't suddenly try to be the stupid college kid. Because you're here.

Clancy Denton  5:36  
Right? And, and, you know, we we had fun at Tanner's parents we. Yeah, we had fun. But like Tegan said, Yeah, but y'all don't get dumb. And y'all can, you know, we know the line and not to cross it. And it was it was sad. That girl was crying. Her mom was embarrassing her. I mean, it was just, you just felt so awful. And yeah, it was just it was really? I mean,

Rick Denton  6:10  
that's a serious one. Yeah, yeah. 

Clancy Denton  6:12  
The rest were funny Like, you know, we tried to call you I was asleep. I mean, it was just, I can just, I wish I'd written down all of the little.

Rick Denton  6:22  
Do remember the one when we were walking, and it was we were suddenly there's a we couldn't see the the girl behind us. But we heard her talking. She was on the phone. And it became clear that she was talking to her parents about rent and a place to live it well, if y'all would just come out and visit. And they clearly didn't want to visit, they wanted to say no to whatever property she wanted to be in, of course, we're hearing half the conversation. So we're making we're filling in some gaps here. And then finally, it was well, if you just give me the money that you were gonna give Jimmy, I'll just pick the place on my own.

Clancy Denton  6:50  
All right, it was just and this is really the first time that I've picked up on it. And maybe it is because I'm in that situation now where, you know, both of our children were in that situation. They're adults. Yeah. You know, they, yes, we still are fully funding them. So we do have some control. But, you know, they're making their own decisions. They're, you know, having to deal with things that mom's not sitting at home waiting for you to come home and tell us what happened, you know, so

Rick Denton  7:28  
even like the place that Tegan is choosing, or at least if everything goes through right, looking at living, we were initially somewhat reluctant. Like we had some very strong perspectives. That's that's not the right word, but just had some concerns going into it. But she the adult child showed us that not only just showed us the place, but kind of walked us through some of the concerns that we had had, and almost spoke to us kind of adult to adult to some degree to the point that we're like, yeah, absolutely. You were right. You were more right than we were going into that thought about where to live.

Clancy Denton  8:01  
And that is one thing. You know, and I know parents, all the parents have college kids right now, especially the freshmen who are in the dorms and want to move out of the dorms. It is insane to me that these kids, they've been there for six weeks. Oh, yeah. And they're already having to figure out where am I living next year? Who am I living with? I have to go through this 52 Page lease agreement with my dad so that we can you know that was doll and yeah, it is crazy. And I will say Teagan has. Teagan has treated it totally different than Tanner did. We were we were the parents on the phone. I'm going to sign the lease right now. I need you to do this. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. You know,

Rick Denton  8:45  
what? You're signing a lease? Yeah, you got to do it in three hours. Yeah. What? Yeah, we're nine months ahead of deadline. And

Clancy Denton  8:53  
Tegan has thoughtfully thought out, you know, where she wants to live. You know, some of the friends already live there. So it's been vetted. So, but it is just so crazy to me that they're already having to figure out next year's living when they're just getting settled in to where they're living. Now. They're barely under

Rick Denton  9:13  
Exactly. They are barely understanding just like simple things like taking the train and that sort of stuff. Teagan knew about it. She's done it, but it's not the same as a senior who has been fully I don't want to overstate taking the train. This isn't New York folks. One light rail line that goes from campus, but it

Clancy Denton  9:27  
is awesome. I loved it. Yeah, we used it quite a bit. Yeah,

Rick Denton  9:31  
absolutely. Yeah. And so that's something that we've talked about is even in Parents Weekend, how we've done Parents Weekend and having them back to back. The difference between our two children was really eye opening and even just how we did parents, we found ourselves feeling differently doing things differently. That I don't know going into it. I really thought about going into it.

Clancy Denton  9:57  
No you could really and and what We, we know the differences between our kids. But it really when Tim was living at home, if she was done with whatever didn't she just went to her room, you know, whereas on Saturday when we had a bulk of time that we didn't have something scheduled, or planned. She's not real. She's not bad, but it's not her jam to just be like, okay, yeah, let's just walk around campus and the tailgates for three hours before the game. Yes, she, you know, shut down. And I pulled you aside and I said, Look, she's done. Yeah, she will, she will come back at the game. But she needed to just chill and have some downtime so that she could get and once we got to the game, she was right back in. And she's talking about I mean, yeah, she was really

Rick Denton  11:03  
over football, which is great. You are right, though, about that, that it was. Whereas when we done the ASU ones, there would be maybe a, okay, we're gonna do this party, and then we're gonna hang out at this house in this case. So there were some scheduled things. But some of those things involved unplanned elements inside of them. And that was okay. This one. And I think, too, there's a little bit of learning that we have about the U of A Parents Weekend that we are not going to invest as much of our social energy in the tailgate that's there, because it's great, it's fine. But it wasn't necessarily the right scene there. For us. You're right, though, that is a difference. And we felt that because it was probably the first time that I'd felt almost like an internal. I don't want my child to be bored when I'm with her. Right. I don't want her to be thinking, Well, I wish my parents weren't here kind of thing. And I had that feeling. And it was more about what you described, rather than her parents. And yeah, once the game started different, and it was also a good game. So that's what helped to she was into it. We were into it. Yes, we left before it was over. Why? Cuz we were all spent. It was a lot of fun. And like y'all saw on that picture, it's beautiful. That sunset going down behind the mountains. Spectacular.

Clancy Denton  12:17  
Yeah, it. And I think probably the kids, and I'm sure a lot of the parents would probably say that, you know, they probably are having a little bit of angst of what do I do with my parents right now? Because we're just here, you know, and so, unfortunately, in Tucson, there's not a ton of close hotels like right around campus that are off nice. And so we were staying pretty far out. It's not like we could just go back to our hotel and say, hey, well, we'll pick you up in a few months. You know, she did come with us. And that was a good time when we could get some we knocked out. Yeah, yeah, her adult business. So. But yeah, so I'm sure she was feeling a little bit of you know, it's not like we can just go hang out in our dorm room. There's nowhere to go in your dorm room. So

Rick Denton  13:09  
and I think that's something we've learned, and we will take away at it a tip for parents going back to school, and I think we came into it naturally with Tanner. Our Saturdays with Tanner frequently where we didn't even see him until the afternoon or even later afternoon because he'd be doing he would wake up later he would do homework. Teagan is an earlier riser. And this was our first time seeing her so we probably tried to maximize as much time with her. I think we now know, to almost replicate elements of how we did it with Hannah have. We hang and then we leave? Yeah. And then we and it's okay for you to go off and do homework. And that's all right. And we'll go do our own thing or sit by the pool. I don't care. But that separation is okay. The first one we just felt that.

Clancy Denton  13:50  
Yeah, we want yeah. And I think she was, you know, excited to be with us too. And she's already prepared us because when we go back in a couple of weeks, she's already said, I do have something going on during and we're like Tegan that's fine. This is just a check in I want to see your face. Is everything good? You know, this is not a you need to cater to us the entire trip this is it just a wellness check or whatever you want to call it on both of them. For Thanksgiving,

Rick Denton  14:21  
let's be honest, it's a wellness welfare checking, and it's a chance to go get some because I was telling you we walked out a church today. I love Arizona. It's funny. How many comments did we get a comment on church? Oh, bear down all that kind of stuff. But we're in this I love that state I'd be there in a heartbeat. Right and so it these trips are also just a chance like this one coming up just to be there. Love it. Sorry, me. So he's behind the chair. It's sorry. We are going to be leaving you for a bit. So he seems concerned.

Clancy Denton  14:49  
So yeah, so you know to do well. So our plan on Sunday was to take her to breakfast and then we were going to go Put our phone up in the car and do our recap. Airport. Phoenix Airport. Yeah. So we pull up to the parking lot at the dorm, she gets in the car, and immediately starts bawling. And I was like, Okay, no, wait, wait, what happened? This is what happened. It's like, I can't do this again.

Rick Denton  15:21  
When we left you everything was good

Clancy Denton  15:23  
cried in this parking lot too many times . So this is where we've had to maneuver that Sunday, and through the beginning of this past week, just how do you help your kids when one you're not physically in the same state that they are? And two, you're trying to give them some leeway. But you're also trying to help them? Direct you know, the stormy seas? That's, you know, you

Rick Denton  16:01  
want to solve for it? Yeah.

Clancy Denton  16:03  
Yeah. I mean, you have to talk. Yeah, I mean, we'll talk about Yeah, we'll get into the way I wanted to see.

Rick Denton  16:13  
Not only are there differences between Tanner and Tegan, there are differences between Rick and Clancy.

Clancy Denton  16:19  
So yeah, so I mean, that's not

Rick Denton  16:21  
how we expected to start there. Because that break and here it is. We were so excited to see her and this is the last chance to say goodbye after a breakfast or I guess we hadn't eaten breakfast yet. But yeah, this was this was a real, kind of almost Teagan's first time with dealing with this sort of relationship difficult. Yes.

Clancy Denton  16:39  
She, for those of you who know Teagan, for her to get a text from someone, and this came later in the week telling her that she was so rude and that she treated people badly. I mean, that is not Teagan know, I mean, I know everyone thinks that a child is good and cannot, you know, do things like that she does have resting bitchface. But she is

Rick Denton  17:12  
not better inside is

Clancy Denton  17:15  
people that she would never be intentionally mean to someone unless she was defending someone else. 

Rick Denton  17:22  
She would never initiate the unkindness and even when the unkindness is brought to her, she is frequently Well, she was always the encourager and drill team, which she's in another word she was the piece of she is

Clancy Denton  17:34  
the beast. And so I don't think when you meet your roommates now, over it's almost like a dating app for people that don't have kids that are currently in college or have not been in college for a while. It is like a dating app. So you know, when things match, great. The first interactions were good. There were just some boundaries that started getting crossed, and

Rick Denton  18:08  
boundaries and some incompatibilities that were unexpected. Yes, yes. And I'm not even gonna say right or wrong here. Just compatibilities about even even the innocuous like times and schedule, right. So that's why I'm using that term. Yeah, some of the boundaries, though, there is a right and wrong some of those boundaries, even still, it was its roommate conflict with depth that just was

Clancy Denton  18:30  
and you know, I will say it probably started the second week of school, maybe third. And, you know, Tegan had addressed it directly with her roommate. Things

Rick Denton  18:45  
initiating the conversation. Let's say that yeah, you need to talk about x and they talked about x

Clancy Denton  18:50  
and things got better for a few days, but then, you know, so. Tegan took it up, you know, went and talked to her Ra. You know, for advice. Yes. For advice. She was not tattling. She was not

Rick Denton  19:07  
heavy situation. How am I supposed to handle this? Not you fix it for Me Ra, but rather, how do I handle this? Now,

Clancy Denton  19:13  
I will say the one thing Tegan is mature when it come way more mature than some 18 year olds way more mature than some almost 50 year old

Rick Denton  19:24  
and multiple of the 50 year old texts that were not sharing. Her maturity is beyond what I think we expected. And the way she handled and yet when she gets in the car, and she's that upset. Your first reaction as a parent who, eight months ago would have been not a parent of an adult, but now you end up doing math right, but either way. Now it's about how first I even would you know, I even asked Tegan. Do you want recommendations? Like you know, even just asking that are you just telling us what it is? And she didn't say yes. Read the beginning which I found interesting. She She kind of wanted to work through and just talk through this first.

Clancy Denton  20:05  
Yeah. She wanted to vent. Yeah. And that's what you know, and I think you did a good job of that. Because as a male, typically, y'all want to fix oh my god and that you know, and and early even in marriage or marriage or even dating it was, I don't want you to tell me what to do. I'm just telling you what's going on. And let me just Oh, that

Rick Denton  20:30  
is 100% where this came from. You're right.

Clancy Denton  20:33  
And but then, you know, she did and so we helped her and she had already actually really done it figure it out. Yeah, she had already figured out what her plan was. What, you know, so, okay, we, you know, fly back here Sunday. We thought, either silent car, you know, and that evening, we get a text that she said something else had happened. And now, you know, she was taking it to the next level of setting up a meeting with her RA and her roommate.

Rick Denton  21:08  
As a mediated session, right? She was looking for the RA to be there.

Clancy Denton  21:11  
She just wanted someone else there. Not to take her side but just to be in the room while they were. They can both express their feelings. So okay, so Monday is when we get the barrage of or No, no, it was Tuesday, because yeah, Tuesday group that evening. That's right. Yeah. So Monday, everything I guess went fine. Maybe Monday night was when she said anyways, I don't know the timeline. But yes, Tuesday is when we get texts that Tegan screenshotting me texts coming back and forth. And you know, they're just not not me. She was even like, I'm in Spanish class, and I'm crying. And

Rick Denton  21:57  
so what do you want to do as a parent? Right, then what do you what do you Clancy what to do in this situation?

Clancy Denton  22:04  
I was about to get on a plane and go take care of things myself. And one of my friends was coming with me to help.

Rick Denton  22:13  
I was being asked for two tickets to Tucson to go break laws.

Clancy Denton  22:18  
I really was not going to do that. Now, if if someone had caused any kind of physical harm to my baby, then yeah, I would have been out there. Yeah. And even her brother told me, told me the next day, I was about to get in my car and drive down there. And I was like, it was like both of you Stop, just stop

Rick Denton  22:37  
when you get to pose you need to not do this. So. But that is the natural reaction. Right? And yes, I felt the same thing. What do you want to do? You want to just go? You want to tell an 18 year old? You're being a twit? Yeah. Right. And to be fair, we have one side of the story, I have to be a little bit fair, I feel very confident that this is a case where Tegan was. You know what, I'm not even gonna say that. We just as parents of our child, we sided with our child, and wanted to solve for our child. And it was hard to bite tongues sometimes and not say and not do some of the things that we wanted to say and do.

Clancy Denton  23:18  
And I could have intervened because I had a way to intervene did. But I, I have not this entire time. I haven't

Rick Denton  23:28  
we didn't call the Ri Ra. We didn't call never done that. But I'm in the list of what helicopter parents have done. We could have contacted other parents we could. Interesting, maybe we'll mention a little later. But we found out that that was the right choice on more reasons than we would have realized. Because others had said it being in similar different situation, but roommates situations where they'd contacted the parent and it completely blew up in their face. Yeah.

Clancy Denton  23:55  
And yeah, it's hard. It's just hard to you know, so she tells us, you know, her time is set up for this meeting. And of course, you know, they're two hours behind us and so are you know, so ahead of us or whatever, by I guess. Yeah, I mean, physically, I was sick. All afternoon Tuesday, all when we got to our routed class, which is a class we take at church we asked specifically if we could just stop and pray for Tegan and her roommate. And that, you know, it would just get resolved and everything would be, you know, good. So yeah, so we're sitting there the whole time and routed like, I'm like looking at my phone the whole time. Why isn't she texted yet? Why isn't why is this meeting?

Rick Denton  24:46  
What's happening? Yeah.

Clancy Denton  24:49  
But, I mean,

Rick Denton  24:50  
in the end, I mean, in the end, because, you know, this is more about a story about what we as parents did and need to do and the reality is we did we coached we advised we offered it. Well, I was gonna Yeah, absolutely. What can we do? When your kid asks for advice, we provided it, but we didn't provide it unsolicited. We, we were always there as an ear we and this sounds like we're awesome. By the way, by the way, you know, we were struggling with as well, but we, in the end, we let her know, we support you, we have you we have your back and totally buy into your approach. We think you're being mature and your approach like encouraged her and all that. But we didn't do for her. And we only offered recommendations when she asked for specific recommendations. And, and I want to hope that that's what we'll do going forward. I guarantee that when grandkids get into the mix and all sorts of craziness that we're going to have those same temptations. This was our first first one with her for sure. But certainly the most dramatic moment where we have had to check our instincts as parents recognizing that our child is now not a child, but an adult. And I want to land with this. So much prayer. And yeah, I sincerely believe in the power of prayer. And I sincerely believe in that instance, it helped because the outcome to this story is, I mean, they're not going to room together in the future. But they've come to a cordial compromised agreement to resolve the challenges that they were facing, and set the boundaries that they needed to set.

Clancy Denton  26:26  
And they're talking again, and you know, and they did, both of them had to compromise on some things. It did it and did fine. She said things are good. They, you know, are speaking again, in the room. It's not just like an AC. Yeah, when you enter so, you know, and I would like, you know, I wanted to make sure that someone was with her. I said, when we were on our way to our class that night, I texted her, I said, Are you at the gym? Are you you know, burning off the energy and, and she was like, No, her friend Alex was with her and hanging out with her until you know, so I'm just so thankful that God has put good supportive people are ready. In the first she met them within the first two weeks of school. And, you know, it is just, they are there for each other. We've already seen it in other situations too. And so it's just a good supportive group, which is what she had here. And so I'm glad that she has switched has found it there. And so yeah, so hopefully, you know, let's just keep things moving in the right direction. But we know now, and you know, like you always want to say and but you don't want to hear you will learn something from this. You know, this is a conflict that she has never had to deal with. And especially as a girl, you know, boys, you don't see it as much. I mean, I know there have been some nightmare roommate stories. I've seen them on the Facebook pages. But, you know, boys get over stuff quickly. It's not as usually as there's not the same hangout. Yeah, it's just yeah. And so I am just thankful that she dealt with it. And she dealt with it in the right way. And that they just got things resolved. Because, yeah, it was just, it's gut wrenching. When your child is hurting, hurting and

Rick Denton  28:37  
hurting and so many thoughts flooding your head of not only she hurting, she's hurting 1600 miles away from us. Is this going to affect her grades, it's going to affect her interest in being in college at University of Arizona altogether. All of that she handled maturely, and it's come to a really good conclusion. It just was angst ridden. Because she

Clancy Denton  29:00  
loves that out there and is having a great time. But if you physically live in a place where you don't feel good about being there, so yes, so I'm so glad that it so far.

Rick Denton  29:15  
And yes, yeah. Oh, yeah. This is Oh, that scared me. So behind you.

Clancy Denton  29:23  
You know that it seems to be to be good.

Rick Denton  29:26  
I know. Exactly. We said that during it. But we're tighter. I said the things you're going to have to do. You're going to do but you're going to grow from them. And she did and she didn't want to do the things that she had to do, but she had to do the things that she did. And I

Clancy Denton  29:39  
think you know, going back to your point of talking about you know, when other you know, the kids, significant others children. You know, we were blessed with parents on both sides that never really never tried to step in and metal and you know, So, you know, that has been good models for us that hopefully we will. As long as Tanner's significant other doesn't take him away from us, then I have a

Rick Denton  30:13  
different issue for now. I watched you know, my mom talked about that with Nina, that she said she had the best mother in law because of one the relationship, the positivity that those things, but she didn't get in the way. So I think my mom and did my extension, my dad had that exposure. I'm not sure what informed your parents, but they absolutely were not MEDLARS. And so I hope that weekend, but they, they were involved, they found that wonderful balance of being involved, but not meddling. Yeah. And that I think is going to be a great model for us as we continue into that phase of empty nest, which, oh, let's wait a little while for us to get to that phase. Both kids are the

Clancy Denton  30:53  
new I mean, because one of their mutual friends just got engaged. And it's, you know, T Egan's good friend's sister. And then Tanner was the same age as her. And you know, but she got engaged, but she's not getting married for a while. But, you know, they both looked at me because you were gone, had stepped away and they're like, you have nothing to be worried as like a ya know, I said, let's, let's get through all of your graduate schools and that kind of things. And then then we can talk about

Rick Denton  31:24  
it is fun. Like there's elements of the family that are absolutely like those kinds of things. It was great for the four of us to be together. And those kinds of conversations can be had as a family.

Clancy Denton  31:35  
Yeah. Which is definitely leading us into our

Rick Denton  31:38  
I was doing a segue there. Yes.

Clancy Denton  31:41  
It is nice. You know, we have a full family group chat, then we have chats with both kids. And then they have their own. You know, now this one was on the family one,

Rick Denton  31:53  
we came to find out. There was some good yeah,

Clancy Denton  31:56  
there was some stuff going on. So remember,

Rick Denton  31:58  
let's set this up, though. Remember, we're talking about kids that are two schools in Arizona that are rivals if you don't know, Arizona State and University of Arizona feel the way about each other that Duke and Carolina do or Texas and oh, you feel about each other? It is a good in state or near regional rival?

Clancy Denton  32:15  
Yes. It's a and they like to dig at each other. I mean, even on like the academic side of things, you know, I mean,

Rick Denton  32:25  
we've got full rides. But they've been fighting like this in the fun fighting. So they were wrestling on the bridge up here doing whatever they do.

Clancy Denton  32:36  
Yeah. Now they're Yeah. They both like to get at each other. So so well, yeah, but let's set the so ASU was playing hockey, men's hockey was playing the you have a team? Which? Yeah, well, we'll say what? Yeah, so So Tanner is texting Tegan during the entire game? Oh, it's 400. It's 12 00. My gosh, you know, and she did not respond at all. So then he sends this text. You want to read it?

Rick Denton  33:15  
I forgot to even mention Arizona had an extra man in the eyes for about a minute. ReFS didn't catch it. And we still scored on them. And their responses once

Clancy Denton  33:25  
was sorry, I was busy doing adult things instead of spending time looking for your for scraps of what you can be good at. And we were both regular, like, Whoa, that was a good response. It's the quiet ones that come in with the good responses. So then yesterday, I'm on Facebook, and I was like, Oh, the U of the ASU men's hockey team was playing the U of A men's club hockey team. They don't have a D one team. So take yourself. Okay. So yeah, so the Thanksgiving game is going to be fun between them because we're actually going to it this year. Yes. Thanksgiving game. Yeah. So that'll be that will be a treat. So we'll see if

Rick Denton  34:13  
we can film on site there may be from jail where they're getting bailed out from their battles, but we'll see how that goes. Yeah. So it Parents Weekend was fun. This is going to go down as what I hope I hope is a unique Parents Weekend that is not replicated. You've already said that this weekend when we go out there that we need to go to the same breakfast place so that we can actually enjoy the breakfast

Clancy Denton  34:34  
good. And we were all in such a mood and cry.

Rick Denton  34:38  
I'm trying to I'm over there trying to be the Chandler Vickery trying to make jokes and make us laugh while you and Tegan are crying at the table. I'm sure that servers thought what the heck is going on. So we will go back and have a good meal and enjoy that place. tiny camera the tiny place. Thanks, Frank's maybe 15 seeds good stuff now. Well, the empty nest is quite a journey.

Clancy Denton  35:00  
So it is so. And I'm sure we're, you know, like I said, everyone has dealt with Yeah. Trying to guide their children without driving the boat. I mean, it's just yeah.

Rick Denton  35:15  
That's how we figure it out though. Yeah. And I suppose we figured it out this time around.

Clancy Denton  35:23  
Maybe? Yeah, I mean, we didn't have to do much like I said she pretty much took control. So

Rick Denton  35:29  
absolutely. That ends it. That's another episode. It was it was a lot of fun recording this one again. Yeah,

Clancy Denton  35:35  
please don't forget to share and subscribe and like and

Rick Denton  35:38  
yeah, and there will always be some sort of poll or comments for you to place on the Spotify version of this. Would love to get your opinion about things and get your topics as work eager to know what you want to talk about and actually selfishly we're eager to learn from all of you. So yeah, like follow and tell a friend. 

Alright, kiddo, well, there was another episode 10 I know all to two digits of the loud quiet,

Clancy Denton  36:08  
living the empty nest

Transcribed by https://otter.ai